Throughout Pirates’ History, there have been multiple times in which they’ve had players on the same team with the same last name. It got me curious to see how few last names I could use to not only field a lineup, but field the best version. And because some last names are so common in baseball, I put a rule on myself that I could only use the last name once, and they must have been on the team at the same time with a one use exception where the players must have the same last name, but didn’t have to be on the same Pirates roster. Confused yet? Good. And to further confuse you, I’m taking the entirety of a career, not just time spent with the Pirates.
I’ll choose my last names first and at the end I’ll put together my lineup card.
Wilson: Jack and Craig Wilson played on the Pirates together from 2001-2005. Pirates HOF member Jumping Jack Flash locks down the shortstop position with above average offense and stellar defense. The mullet alone warranted inclusion, but Craig gives us a power bat. But where does he play? Well, the toughest position for this exercise I thought would be catcher. But he’s utility, so I may change this. Thank you to the Sons of Will.
Waner: It’s a shame John Wehner wasn’t born sooner and didn't spell his name differently. But I’m not complaining. I was so fortunate to have this last name to deploy. From 1927-1939, Paul Waner and Lloyd Waner were teammates. When it comes to sizing up these Waners, Paul was certainly the one to write home about. He notched an MVP, 4 All Star appearances (more if the game was older), 3 batting titles, and one trip to the World Series in 1927 which they unfortunately lost to one of the best teams ever assembled.
But, don’t sleep on Lloyd. This Waner was quite impressive when you really take a look. He notched 2,459 hits, contended for the MVP in multiple seasons, and had 1 All Star appearance. Having two Waners fill two holes in the outfield was a no brainer. Two Hall of Famers for the price of one is a dream come true. Crazy to think they weren’t even remotely related.
Bell: This is going to be my one time exception pick. So any Bell, as long as they were once on a Pirates roster. We get to fill three positions with this name. In the DH, I’ve got Josh Bell. This adds some much needed power from the one time All Star and Silver Slugger award winner. At second base, even though he was primarily a SS, I’m going Jay Bell. Pairing him with Jack makes me feel like nothing would've gotten to the outfield on the ground. They both played both positions at one point, so I’m happy to let them sort it out. And the final Bell I’ll select Operation…Gus Bell. It’s true, he did most of his stellar work as a Red in the 50s and 60s, but these are the parameters in which I have to work. I’ll take a 4 time All Star anywhere I can get one.
Frazier: Adam Frazier and Todd Frazier played together for the Pirates in 2021, brief but nonetheless together. Adam primarily a Bucco, Todd a Red but again, tough parameters. Adam Frazier played virtually every position in his career except catcher. Todd was also pretty
versatile. He had more experience and better size for first base. So I’m putting Todd at the 3 and Adam at the 6. Both add at least one All Star appearance. Todd brings with him one Home Run Derby championship and Adam probably won a whiffle ball HR Derby as a kid.
Without further adieu, our Minimum Last Name Lineup, catchy right?
Leadoff: Lloyd Waner OF
2) Adam Frazier 3B
3) Paul Waner OF
4) Todd Frazier 1B
5) Josh Bell DH
6) Craig Wilson C
7) Gus Bell OF
8) Jack Wilson SS
9) Jay Bell 2B
We fielded a very competitive lineup with only 4 last names. And this could’ve gone many different ways had we thrown some more extremely common names in there. But this is what I went with.
Stay tuned for the pitching staff.
